stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

If you ever think you did something embarrassing just remember that I had a really hot waiter one time and i was gonna order double pepperoni pizza but I looked him dead in the eye and accidentally asked for double penetration pizza in front of my whole family

Stop reblogging my failure

(via infinitephan)

Let me be your:

7am morning fuck before you go to work

Midday text, letting you know that you’re on my mind

5pm cuddle after a long days work

11pm rough fuck as i pound away the frustrations of your day

2am soft whisper in your ear, as i tell you “i love you”

(Source: forever-dirty-minded, via sik3rning)

strangergirls:

oy-eld-thankee:

I love how the other one is like “whoop, heres my ride”

Get in, loser, we’re going mopping

strangergirls:

oy-eld-thankee:

I love how the other one is like “whoop, heres my ride”

Get in, loser, we’re going mopping

(Source: kittiezandtittiez, via sik3rning)

No one’s life seems great between midnight and 7 a.m. Go to sleep. Things will be better tomorrow.
(via 99lightbulbs)

(Source: themethfairy, via sik3rning)

bitchisyouserious:

kingjaffejoffer:

the-real-goddamazon:

zerostatereflex:

Fertilization

A beautifully done animation on how you became you.

See the full video here as I left out some really cool parts.

From 300 or so million down to ONE.

YOU. MADE. IT.

NIGGA WE MADE IT

The most impressive thing any of us will ever do

I have yet to do something greater than being the one who made it. Salute a real nigga when you see one.

(via tequiladick)

(Source: bobsburgerscaps, via pizza)

paxamdayum:

theladypipsqueak:

hipstaa-pleazz:

heavyxhand:

xviolenceagainstviolencex:

peanuhbutta:

pleatedjeans:

So, this half black/white kid got a tattoo of the Oreo barcode on his wrist


Why does it matter matter that this guy is mixed race!? You could of just written, “This kid”. Like his fucking skin colour matters! Cunt.

His bi-racial ethnicity is probably the point of the Oreo tattoo joke, cunt.

Dead.

imagine this kid working as a cashier, and this one customer is pissing them off, so they just casually swipe their tattoo under the scanner, after every item, and later the customer is just like, I DONT REMEMBER BUYING FIFTY CASES OF OREOS. (via)

whenever someone asks me what tumblr is, i will show them this post

paxamdayum:

theladypipsqueak:

hipstaa-pleazz:

heavyxhand:

xviolenceagainstviolencex:

peanuhbutta:

pleatedjeans:

So, this half black/white kid got a tattoo of the Oreo barcode on his wrist

Why does it matter matter that this guy is mixed race!? You could of just written, “This kid”. Like his fucking skin colour matters! Cunt.

His bi-racial ethnicity is probably the point of the Oreo tattoo joke, cunt.

Dead.

imagine this kid working as a cashierand this one customer is pissing them offso they just casually swipe their tattoo under the scannerafter every itemand later the customer is just likeI DONT REMEMBER BUYING FIFTY CASES OF OREOS. (via)

whenever someone asks me what tumblr is, i will show them this post

(via sik3rning)

lottosim:

Sloth on a speedboat

lottosim:

Sloth on a speedboat

(via sik3rning)

stickysheep:

soapbutts:

loreface:

runningoffthereeses:

well, thats enough internet for today

good. yes.

OH. Plant monster dingus.

Hi I want a million of these pillows and I want to send them out to my family.

(via pizza)

lackyannie:

theangiec:

This makes me laugh. everytime. I will never not reblog this 

THIS IS MY NUMBER 1 FAVORITE THING OON THIS GOD FORSAKEN SITE

lackyannie:

theangiec:

This makes me laugh. everytime. I will never not reblog this 

THIS IS MY NUMBER 1 FAVORITE THING OON THIS GOD FORSAKEN SITE

(Source: theangiec83, via pizza)

ladynecro:

my friend has black hair and the initials PM while her boyfriend has blonde hair and the initials AM and she told me that they joke that theyre ‘as different as night and day’ and i fell on the floor that shit was so adorable

(via pizza)

Early 20's
Graphic Design
LSU

If you live in a dream world, reality will disappoint you.